Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Deep Water - 20 April 2010

I am in deep, deep, beautiful, aquamarine water.  I am swimming up toward the surface of the water.  My eyes are open.  I am calm and comfortable in the water.  As I near the surface of the water, I suddenly have this knowing that in the time it's taken me to make this journey to the surface of the water (less than a minute, it seemed like), I realize that I have lived my entire 58 years in this short space of time.  It's as if all that I have ever lived took less than a minute of time.

I feel quite alive as I am leisurely swimming up toward the surface, but once I have this realization, that in this short space of time, I have lived and experienced my 58 years, I wonder to myself if I am actually dead.  I am literally inches from the surface and I suddenly have the additional awareness that I am lying in my bed dreaming all this.  My focus changes to my body lying in my bed dreaming, and I actually wonder if I have died sometime during this experience, and I am not at all sure that I am alive.  Further, I wonder that even if I wake up from this experience with full consciousness, I will have to wonder if I haven't already died. 

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